My Longkang

Character : Late 30s mother of three.

Mary : It started with the teacher. She used my youngest son as an example in English class. “ Your mother brings you food every day. You eat it at the canteen.” Some how after that his classmates started to tease him with words like ‘baby’. I do it basically because it is cheaper than to eat at the canteen.

He doesn’t like to walk with me now. He always walks a few steps behind or in front of me. The teasing has turned to my job. I am earning an honest living. I am a cleaner. I also wash toilets.

Now his friends tell him he is dirty because I am a cleaner. His school held a book exhibition recently. He bought a book for Rm2.95. I eyed the book suspiciously and asked him where he got the book. He doesn’t need the book. He already has an old copy given by my sister. He wanted a new copy. I give him 10 sen a day and he saved a month for it. He will ‘rasa malu’ if all his friends have a new book and he doesn’t have it.

I didn’t want to be a cleaner. Life just turned out that way. I tidak pandai sekolah. My pay of Rm380.00 ( ‘tak lumayan tapi sekadar cukup-ample’ ) helps out with the family finances. I need to feed all my children and buy books, clothes, shoes etc. They grow up so fast. Nothing is thrown away.

If I am a politician’s wife and my husband has an affair with a woman ( referring to a certain high profile case ) I wouldn’t mind. I would just enjoy my life of luxury. After all unless there is a divorce, the man always returns home. As a woman, that is all we can hope for.

Character : Late 20s mother of two.

My mother scolded me. She said I am being silly. She said I should have my own nest egg. After all I am a government officer earning a reasonable income. She said after going to university how can I be so silly and leave everything for my husband to manage.

I am too lazy to go to the bank. There is the parking, looking for a parking space etc. With two kids it isn’t easy. My husband has total control of my money. After every Rm5 000 he will transfer to a fixed deposit or invest in something or other. He gives me some pocket money to spend.

My mum thinks I trust my husband too much. He is after all my husband. He is unlikely to leave me high and dry especially when he loves my children so much. You must understand he is a dominant person. He just likes things to follow his way of doing things. I once approached him for some financial independence and it got him so angry I have never approached the subject again.

I don’t have any real money in my name. It is all in my husband’s name. I don’t mind. As long as there is peace in the home. As far as I know he doesn’t fool around or mix much with his friends. He is a loner. He comes home immediately after work. But I think he dabbles in the stock market. He is a good man.

I am just writing to share with you how I spent my day. I had a great time at the gym pushing my muscles to go all the way. I did the horizontal and inclined bench press with weights of up to 110 lbs.

Maybe I am just being egoistic and want to look good without a huge pot-belly but the truth of the matter is i like to feel the adrenaline flowing. It removes the stress that is in me.

Anyway I spent my evening with a reticient English man, a New Zealander and an Iraqi. It really opened my eyes. I read about the global impact of high fuel and food prices but it is different to hear it face to face. Apparently these guys think we are leading a good life. I am beginning to feel they are right.

For most of us, we can survive albeit with some difficulties but talking to the Iraqi really opened my eyes.

Iraqi man ( late 40s ) : It is the international media. They give a distorted version of the reality in my country. My people are suffering but the Amercians are being hailed as some kind of international policemen and international saviour. Do you know how much a lecturer in my country earns? It is all about vested interest. Do not trust them so much.

We have been suffering for so many years. No end seems in sight. Our civilization dates back thousands of years and our people are well educated and not some terrorism prone fringe group. They made my country what it is.

Look at Sibu. I see the people are well fed and prosperous. The country is stable and although there is some kind of media hype overseas about the political situation, there is peace. There are ample job opportunities if one is not too choosy.

English man : I leave politics to the politicians. All this cussing about the fairness of this regime and that is meaningless. As an ordinary citizen, there is little the average citizen can do. A nation must be responsible for its own destiny. Oil is a powerful financial factor for foreign interference. I am just here for a holiday. If you have issues, make your voice heard.

New Zealander : The high price of fuel and food has affected my country’s economy. It is not just a Malaysian problem. When I convert my currency to Malaysian currency, everything is so cheap! I have only one comment. The Malaysian safety net is not extensive enough. I saw an almost naked man sleep on card board sheets on the street just now. People just walked by without even noticing him.

There should be more of a welfare state for the benefit of its citizens. But the food here is great and I love the weather. One more thing, I don’t understand why the Sibu people must work so hard. The people I meet work from morning to night. There is only the weekend left and normally they spend their time with their community based activities. Where is the time for the family and recreation?Children should not be stressed with their school work. Let them develop as individuals

One more thing, the road from the airport to town was terrible. ( I don’t agree. I think the road from the airport to town is good enough. )

Btw a friend of mine has started blogging. Please do drop by and visit him at http://www.victor-kiu.blogspot.com. i am using an upgraded version at my blog and I still haven’t learned how to link

.

I found this slow song from Foong at http://foongpc.blogspot.com/. It is called Song of a Secret Garden . I hope you like it.

I sometimes wonder what most of us see when we look in the mirror. Do we see ourselves as others see us? That thought has been going through my mind after I had a chat with a very tall lady in her forties. She was fantastically fit and definitely didn’t look her age.

She said, “ I cannot stop the passage of time. You can see my elbows, my neck, area around my eyes. There are signs of aging. There is nothing I can do to slow the passage of time. I am developing long-sightedness and the dentist suggested I extract some of my teeth and replace them with dentures. “What’s the point of saving them?”, he asked me. It is only a matter of time as they have decayed beyond help.

I realized something was wrong when my daughters started to borrow my clothes. Obviously I am dressing too young for my age.

As she said this she twirled her head and her straightened and dyed hair swirled around her like a scene from a commercial. She is obviously still very beautiful. But she has a point. We can take cosmetic measures, dress young, maintain a young image, talk young etc but time is passing us by.

I commented.”Let us age gracefully.” She looked at me in a put-on wide-eyed expression of horror.

Original conversation in Hockkien

Pic from archives

Have you eaten? You have a good woman. She looks healthy and strong.

I was born in 1913. I came from China as a young girl. The Second World War was a difficult time, After the war, I worked as a house servant for a family. When the wife died I took her place. None of the children are mine. We had a dinner, took photographs and then we were husband and wife. Things were simple. The family wasn’t rich.

This area used to be a good area. Now with clogged drains and frequent flooding, it has become a slum. You can see many people of other races from the rural areas renting rooms here now. The original families have moved out..

I used to be mobile. After falling three times, I can no longer move around. I wait for my grandchildren to prop me up against the chair every morning. I look out the window and see my neighours. I have not been upstairs for almost ten years.

My grandson is a good man. I wait for him to marry and then I am ready to die. I tell you every body is afraid to die. Whoever tells you he is not afraid to die is a liar. But I am tired. Very tired. My mind is alert. I know everything that is happening around me. But I can’t make my hands and legs move as I want them to. Nowadays my hearing and eye-sight are no longer as good as it once was.

I sometimes fall asleep at my chair. My husband and some of my children are already gone. I will join them soon. I will be in My Father’s home soon. I am tired. I will be ready. Every body has to go some time. I don’t know how many more Chinese new year i can still celebrate with my family. Only God knows. I think all my friends are no more.

Be a good man. Do no bad things and always save money for your old age.

Deco pic from archives

I had intended to blog about this for a few weeks but the subject matter is unpleasant. However I met a man yesterday who changed my mind. After talking to him I decided to share his experience so parents out there may be more aware of the potential of their children mixing with the wrong sort and going astray.
Read more »

Character : Jerry, mid twenties.

Jerry : The minute he came in the hall, we knew we were doomed. It was supposed to be a friendly match. But we needed to win. Our girlfriends were there. He came in a Vios which was normal enough but he was dressed as if he had stepped off the pages of a sports magazine.
Read more »

Character : Mid twenties and expecting the first baby.

Fiona: I married too young. I thought i would have a few years after marriage before having a child. The child came within the first month. I have still a few more months to go. My husband is never around as our working hours do not match. My mother in law drops in all the time to spy on me and my housework.
Read more »

Character : Late 30s, father of three and active in non-governmental organizations. Very fair complexion, big eyes, well toned and good with his hands. Generally known to some of his closer friends as Mr Pajero in jest.
Read more »

Character : Beth, early fifties, female.

Beth : Did you see that? She said her baby is cute. Her baby smiles when she touches the baby. Everybody has babies. What is so special about her baby? All babies are the same. She looks like that and her husband has a laborer’s look. How beautiful can the child be?
Read more »